Category: poetry

struggles of someone who loves me immensely
and yet has to negotiate
every small corner of comfort is not easy
when she falls down
i am not around
and when i am
am i there wholesomely
even a glance away is noticed and then
i wonder
what am i doing
should i settle down
and sediment,
or keep afloat some how
even if it
means allowing waves to determine
the purpose and pace of the journey

hatheeli kaviaton se mera pala bhi pada tha

aur mainey saha tha unka tana

ki mainey unhey chhala tha

lekin jab se meri kavitaon ne mera kehna manana shuru kar diya hai

main ajeeb sa mehsoos kar raha hun

kabhi lagta hai, kuchh keh pata hun

aur kuchh ke baarey mein chup rehta hun

ab taya karna padega

kuchh adhoora kehna shreyaskar hai

ya phir bilkul chup rehna

jisko jo bhi andaza lagana hai, laga ley

aaropon ke gharondey me jab koi swapn

rahega

to, shikayat to hogi hi usko

kisee aankhon mein paley

iska nirnay ab sapney ko karney detey hain

aur ham chup chap aankhon ko band kar letey hain

why do not sediments settle down

why do i keep floating

like a sea weed

is it the love waves have with the banks

that prevent the boat to puts its anchor

or  is it a yearning for shores far beyond

which unsettles the ship

in a still sea

i am not sure,

if i want to lose the hope

of finding pearls

in the sea

i will not settle down till i find those pearls

in the sea

or till I become a small faint star in the sky

tumney poochha kyun itna dard apney dil mein basata hun

kaisey bataun

kis kis ki yadon ko dil se lagata hun

kuchh hain jinhoney muh mod liya

aur kuchh hain jinhoney

itna sneha diya

ki main karjey mein doob gaya

ab intzaar mein hun

kab meri jail se chhutti ho jayey\

atma vileen ho jayey

aur mein swantara seemaon se parey vicharu

lekin phir dhyan aata hain tumhara

kaun tumharey ghuteny par tel lagayega

aur kaun tumhari chauton ko sehlayagega

aur phir main apni hi jail mein

tala lagata hun

aur chabi door phainkeney ke hidayat dekar

chaukidaar ko fuslata hun

you were not happy because

you could not achieve what you wanted

you may blam e me

because i loked at all the plants on teh way

whcih we had considred weeds

and i also smelled all the fragrances \

which were seen

as diversion

but how i tell you

that it made me become vulnerable

without which

my ego will not be tamed

so let me wander

and seek some moments

with those who want this place to

be different

and some who have dreams in their eyes

may be then i can help you

a bit better,

fulfill

yours

i see so many popel making you

irrelevant

by revriing you so much

that you beocme inaccessible

i wish you had indulged in things which

will help you beceme weak

vulnerable

and thus accessible

may be you did

and masked that face

may be not

but it does not matter so long as your haughtiness

is what makes you so lovable

jangal mein ghar bananey ka khyal
to kai baar merey man mein bhi aaya hai
lekjin haar bar
apna janglipan
jangal ke niyamo ke layak
nahin man paya
laga bahut kuchh seekh gaya hun,
shaharon mein rah kar
jahan yadon ko deewaron par to taang saktey hai
par unka jangal nahin uga saktey

ab mein apni yadon ke beej lekar nikal pada hun
kahin padti jamin mein hi sahi,
bo aunga
tum bhi dhyan dena
agar ho sakaey to do boond paani daal
dena
waisey mere paas aansu to bahut hain
lekin jab bhi mainey yadon ko unse seencha hai
wo kuchh bad kar phir murjha si jaati hain, lagta hai
khara pan unhey raas nahin aata
ab main ansuaon ko meetha kaisey banaun

har roj ek kavita likhney ka wayada kiya tha,
ab nibhatey nibhatey aadat si ho gayi hai, saath
wo chalti hi kaha hai
koi rubai
koi gazal
ya phir koi muktak
sabhi to apni apni dishaon mein ugatey hai
kisko samjhaun
ek hi bagiya mein khilney ke liyey
koi nahin manta
mainey kab kisee ki baat mani hai
hamesha kaha, dard hi sach hai,
baaki sab kuchh bemani hai

you may not know

whether you could call

any time,.

but then you did and found,

the same readiness to engage with life

which had created the doubt in the first place

now, blame it on the smiles that i have always carried

with me to mask

my inner pains

or on my willingness to walk

a few extra steps whenever

some body seems to carry my burdens a bit afar

but then i am not willing to be drenched

in rain of sufficiency again

a traveler in desert does

not learn to quench his thirst too often