anil gupta's blog

there was a lot of pain all this while
when you kept quiet
and also when you spoke
now , silence alone can heal
let the river flow
and breeze not get halted

the cracks in the surface
on which you wanted to build the
edifice of your hopes
were visible to eyes, so young still

but we could not see them
for so long
will these eyes ever forget our difference
i hope they do

in that dark alley
we had touched a truth
while walking through a forest
with fallen leaves
making crackling sound every now and then
as to remind
that kingdom of silence had not been reached
yet
i know
and you to
that there
we dont need words
nor do we open eyes
we just absorb
the truth
of intimacy
wrapped
in a shawl of silence
but transparent
now the shawl is soiled a bit
words are no more what they used to be
i understand
it is ok
we can weave another shawl
someday
when our breaths would have spun enough yarn
of patience and tolerance
today it is in short supply
but only today

karuna ki parakashtha
wo kshana
wo sihran
wo sparsh
wo saans ki dhumil dhwani
wo chhoti si baat par tunakna
wo bahut badhi galtion ko
bhoolna
wo
chup chap
meri udwignta ko sehna
wo befikri ke saath galey lagna
wo sanjeendigi ke saath sab kuchh samjhna
shabdo ke aavaran ke bina
artho ko apney hriday mein atmsaat karna
wo sparsh
wo kshna
kya wo bas ek kshan hi tha

I didn’t know
That
Tears were torn
Between an authentic urge
And a make believe
Web of excuses

But it doesn’t matter now
The banks were broken
River did flow but
Now drought of desires
Has made both
Irrelevant
But still
Let us accept

Some sparks are left
Of smouldering coal
In the fireplace
Of a cardboard hut
We made
May be some day
While walking alongside the sea
It might catch fire
And burn us

Go away
Quietly
The carrier of
Virus of voyerism
In your womb

Go away
dont look beyond the prairie
Edge
The dried lake

Abandoned hut
Music of forlorn lovers
Is played
Here
Every dark night
Come and listen to that
Absorb the joy
Of non reciprocal love
Faith without expectations
This world has become
Too calculative
Fur my taste
Grow out of the bonds
Our trust created
Go away
Go
Away

Why are we here
To stand, pause
And just stare?
Or wait
For a whiff of fresh air
Thoughts that surprise
Flowers that have no price
Grow In the garden
That is manured
By the tears uncalled
A journey to nowhere
But stalled
I m now
Here
Thanks to the steps
I faltered
You stopped
And halted
The sway of a storm
Untamed and
With a mind of its own

When I was in pain
I was born again
You sculpted me afresh
In the rain
When I was in pain
The clay dissolved
The North Star moved
A bit away
From its well settled
Position, it held its sway
Now I m here
In pain again
Why have I suffered
The redeeming healing
Is it the fear
Of losing care
The truth
That I may not dare
To say and share
But why will I hide
The remarks you made
Vicious and snide
But does it really matter
Who cares, what will a pod scatter

Seeds ripe to sow the pain
Again
You sculpt me in the rain
You sculpt me in the Rain

Do I miss that
You ask
In a yellow cafe
With blue curtains
Set amidst a trove of palms
Most are tall
But some might have
Sprouted
Recently
May be a few years ago
They are still trying to
Gather
Enough haughty strength
To bear with storms
May be in a desert
Of desires
To touch
to feel
And
To smell
The aroma of breaths
That often connect the purity of
Heart
Like passing through a tunnel
Of tense corridor of concern
And a smiling sky
Laden with a quilt of clouds
With no doubt
Little to hold
Little to choose
And you ask
Do I miss
A kiss
That engraves signature
Of timeless love
Of yesteryears hanging like a curtain
On a worn out window
With lose hinges
And who knows
The panes may give way
Next time you bang the door
In anger at my patience
And also the placidity
Of pure love
As if a green creeper on a dead tree
Embraces the breeze
And then with a twinkle in its eye
Smile at the snail
Who is walking slowly
To the same place
Where you asked
Do you really miss
Do you
Do

distances could not drive the fear
out of a black small cat
she remained still
under a window

half open
as if
light had got tired of remaining inside
so started filtering out
slowly
just as curtain moved
and wind blew it away
i could see clearly
the reflection of a broken mirror
on that wall
on which calendar still showed a year old date