how do i clarify
why was i sleepy
when you were telling the story
abhimanyu
was listening
in my womb
not knowing that my sleep
delayed for so long, so often
because you know why
will not let him live for long
what could have i done,
i carry the guilt for so many centuries
and every time
i feel sleepy
the face of abhimanyu asks me
to clarify
how do i tell him
i did not know
i still do not know
how do i defy
you
O lord
soak the time, tame the tide
soak the time, tame the tide
said the happy squirrrel,
without any reservation or pride
i did not know
how do i soak the moments
which are laced with the smiles
of the time that i wish
i had by myself all the while
but alas, i am
not allowed
to seek
the solace that sustains
my quest for peace
i have to run, and run again
so that tide does not carry
the boat anchored in the sea
i am quiet, u too remain quiet
who knows in the silence
will speak
the spirits in balance
you are a big river
you are a big river
wanting to meet only the sea
but have no reservations
on assimilating the small streams
i am a rivulet
just flowing in this season
may dry up tomorrow or next day after
will you let me
be part of you
so that all the vapours in the sky
soak the time
tame the tide
and leave a trail
for some one to follow
who has no faith in future
or past
but has a desire to cast
a shadow of his love
on every step
of this stair
where sages have walked
but afraid of despair
mind is restless
mind is restless
and body is tired
the boat has survived
but the river is in spate
still,
you ask me to forget
and focus only on future
but then there are images
hidden in the clouds in the sky
if i see the sky
i get restless
and when i keep eyes below
i remember
all the stories you narrated
all the songs you sang
all the poories you fried
and all the arguments
you decided not to have
why do not i just rest
less in the shade
and more under the sun
793: i am the explanation
i am the explanation
said the sparrow
and went on with her search
for a nest full of comfort
that can not be guaranteed
but prayed for,
that can be designed but not delivered
after all
rims of an old cart
are rusted
when the cart stays still
make it run
so what if you forget when to stop
where to stop
792 the tree has been pruned,
the tree has been pruned,
termites are invited to a feast
they can stay as long as they wish
or make me their home
to keep them alive, i will die slowly
and slowly
till they pulverize me
and then will grow some flowers
which you will not have any hesitation
in picking and give to your love
you can wait that long
or help me die sooner and
have your flowers grow faster
791 whistle slowly, the birds are chirping outside,
whistle slowly, the birds are chirping outside,
do not be so happy, do not laugh loudly
who knows the squirrel
may be in conversations with the ants
who speak so feebly
why is the cat
black one, i mean
scaring the birds
has the space been squeezed
or the winter
has left only a few sunny spots
to be shared among all
in the shade of tall trees
the halo of her resolution
i see you struggling
every day
some time you limp and
some day you fall
but it does not dilute
your resolve to carry on
with
the burden of my inability
to be around every time
you need to pause and wait and see
how the sun has risen today
with hopes and glee
is a pain i lived with
so far
but hope that i will soon be absolved
when you will smile
with a new poise
and i may be around
or no more at all
but you will carry on
with your missions
to serve
all those i wanted to
but could not enough
life has peaks and some expected trough
forgive me o deity of devotion
if only i had served you
a bit more than i could
may be any good deed that i did
will enable you to walk
straight without ever having to skid
but do listen to the talk
of sparrows, and mayenas
and squirrels i could feed
thanks to your benevolence
i will always admire
no matter what any one may say
or desire
791 when friends could not understand
when friends could not understand
and the foes defied
the boundaries of my affection
no body could hide
i have always shared my
only treasure i had
lots of love without
any expectation of returns
i will go away
and you will have to carry
the legacy of this love
which illuminates the way
of all those who
time did not permit
to rise and be raised
like the priveleged stars in the sky
but you have to burn and dissolve
no matter what is the resolve
of those who will despise you
what will remain
is the light of a small candle
that you light in the darkness
some can live with in their hearts
but some can not handle
47 kaali: pl forgive those who suspect your benevolence
kaali:
pl forgive those who suspect your benevolence
i have never held a grudge against any one
who defaced your footprints
burried the memories of your kindness
and erased the mark of vermillion from
the pipal tree,
or an abandoned stone,
a broken boat;
why should i grudge
the debris of demons
you really destroyed
in me and in all those who are unable to
assimilate the essence of your kindness
you have taught me to forgive and
i have forgiven
you told me to bless
and i bless
why do then some have
such hatred in their heart
will not you bless them
and let them be in peace
why should not they be able to grow and greet
all strangers
and the friends
with ever goodness and benign benevolence
your apparent indifference may be a time of trial
for truth and transparency
that only few can admire
i pray like ever before
do not worry, do not budge
just be there for all those who
need you
more than me,
i will suffer and still sustain
devotion to not only those i know
but also towards the perfect strangers
one we do not yet know and
can never know