anil gupta's blog

Memories are very rich
But the sieve is broken
They are not filtered any more
That’s why truth
Is accessible

Ambivalence assured
No question need be asked
Just flow
Be true to yourself
Admit lapses
Overwritten synapses
There is a misswired connection
Nothing can be done
Coffee is ready
Aroma will work
Don’t claim
New territory
Abandon all designs
Just fade away

It adorned your forehead
But now
Somehow
I see it scattered over the sky
In the rays of setting sun
In the volcanic eyes
In the smouldering
Fire of unmet desires
In the anger
Wasted over don’t know
Whys
I see it
In the footprints of
A devotee
I see it in the corners of your eyes
Tired
Without much sleep
I see it In the boil
On your lips
I see it in every wound
You inflicted in my sky
But it’s forgiven
Fly
Scatter your grace

I don’t know where have I reached
I m not sure about that
I m trying though
But will I ever reach
I m not even sure
That I want to reach somewhere
So in this confusion land
Let me just walk
And walk

besides a lake
some horses graze
grass is unkept
but then in its wildness
it
is refreshing
the stream is tamed
but the ripples go
sometimes out of control
a bird swallowed those ripples
and flew away
and then curtain in a clean window
has those waves imprinted

i am looking at these curtains
one day these looked so different
and then promise was betrayed

there are many flower beds
waiting to be nourished
let me focus on manuring them
i cannot succeed all the time
failing in some cases proves
genuinity of pursuit
i am happy
it is revealing so eloquently

truth is that one can not admit distractions
and the failed missions
blaming me will not help
i am moving on now

i admit
i cannot be deluding myself
any more

that a good turn will sooner
or later
reverberate
may be resonance is rusted now

i know you tried
to plant seeds of flowering shrubs
after all it had rained so late
but then how does it matter
if you ploughed the field
as if nothing growing there was of your liking
but do we weed out every thing we dont like
even if
it is meant to nourish our soul
and sprit

what an irony,
to be blamed for not being generous enough
and in the event of generosity
being blamed for being too generous
ah!!
no way
can one have a way though

i know you tried,

so what
if generosity is drained away
if wishes dont become horses
if camel of caring voices
does not walk through the
desert of pious desires

so what

vain rain
it is no pain
sing, dance
celebrate the cloud bursts
but dont remain
in cocoon of contrived
excuses
to smile
when one should really be crying
why do we cheat ourselves
why do we cross the bridge of naivete
why can not we respect
an authentic search
for meaningful
reciprocity
O! Mother Kaali
why are you testing basic faith
in fundamental
goodness
why
the clouds are drained
is the pain vain?

As if to prove
That my paints will not stick
You broke the rainbow
I tried hard
But will to have one’s way
Can sway
All the winds
Away
Punctured sails
Leaking boat
Broken rainbow and
Soluble paints
Nothing is allowed to work
May be Phoenix is determined to melt it’s wings